Random randomness

hentzau · Post by **hentzau** » Fri Jul 20, 2018 10:28 am

Tom Cruise appearing in Mission Impossible: Fallout is five years older than Wilford Brimley was when he appeared in Cocoon.

Post by **ImLawBoy** » Fri Jul 20, 2018 10:29 am

Daehawk wrote: ↑Thu Jul 19, 2018 6:46 pm Im going to say it if no one else has the balls..David Lee Roth cannot sing or carry a tune. Im sorry folks. He was great in the day but that day has set and he doesn't realize it. Will people stop handing him a mic please. Yes he can probably still out sing me but I know I cant sing. There I said it.

If Dave wants to show up and bash me Im ok with that.

You say that as though you think it's controversial. I'm guessing even Dave knows that whatever voice he once had abandoned him long ago. His career was based on his charisma and having great guitarists around him, not on his singing chops.

Daehawk · Post by **Daehawk** » Fri Jul 20, 2018 2:40 pm

hentzau wrote: ↑Fri Jul 20, 2018 10:28 am Tom Cruise appearing in Mission Impossible: Fallout is five years older than Wilford Brimley was when he appeared in Cocoon.

What sorcery is this?

Isgrimnur · Post by **Isgrimnur** » Fri Jul 20, 2018 2:43 pm

Hair dye, plastic surgery, low Thetan counts, and no contact with Suppressive Persons.

Daehawk · Post by **Daehawk** » Fri Jul 20, 2018 3:13 pm

I now now that while listening to the radio on the toilet that if Under Pressure by Queen comes on it is not the fun song it usually is.

Daehawk · Post by **Daehawk** » Fri Jul 20, 2018 3:17 pm

Actually looking it up Wilford Brimley was 51 in cocoon and Tom Cruise is 56.

Z-Corn · Post by **Z-Corn** » Fri Jul 20, 2018 3:19 pm

disarm wrote: ↑Thu Jul 19, 2018 8:11 pmI don't think anyone can listen to this and disagree with you...

Runnin' with the Devil - Vocals Only

Oh see now, I love this!

I just listened to this again recently and it just cracks me up. I've been singing this just like Diamond Dave as loud as I can to my own great amusement.

My wife isn't laughing as much...

Kasey Chang · Post by **Kasey Chang** » Sun Jul 22, 2018 3:26 pm

Things people say at traffic stops...

Skinypupy · Post by **Skinypupy** » Mon Jul 23, 2018 12:43 pm

Fuck summer colds.

That is all.

hepcat · Post by **hepcat** » Mon Jul 23, 2018 1:08 pm

Getting old sucks. I'm now an F restriction on my Illinois driver's license. Which means I have to have both side view mirrors on any vehicle I drive.

I honestly thought you were required by law to have both side view mirrors.

...oddly enough, I was able to read line 5 on the eye chart, but couldn't make out a single letter on the larger and clearer line 4. This was apparently disconcerting to the lady giving me the test. "How the hell can you make out line 5, but not line 4?" she exclaimed more than once.

Default · Post by **Default** » Mon Jul 23, 2018 1:59 pm

https://www.theonion.com/hillshire-farm ... 1827772614

Brian · Post by **Brian** » Mon Jul 23, 2018 3:38 pm

hepcat wrote: ↑Mon Jul 23, 2018 1:08 pmI was able to read line 5 on the eye chart, but couldn't make out a single letter on the larger and clearer line 4. This was apparently disconcerting to the lady giving me the test. "How the hell can you make out line 5, but not line 4?" she exclaimed more than once.

Pyperkub · Post by **Pyperkub** » Mon Jul 23, 2018 4:19 pm

hepcat wrote: ↑Mon Jul 23, 2018 1:08 pm Getting old sucks. I'm now an F restriction on my Illinois driver's license. Which means I have to have both side view mirrors on any vehicle I drive.

I honestly thought you were required by law to have both side view mirrors.

...oddly enough, I was able to read line 5 on the eye chart, but couldn't make out a single letter on the larger and clearer line 4. This was apparently disconcerting to the lady giving me the test. "How the hell can you make out line 5, but not line 4?" she exclaimed more than once.

In CA, the law has been that the driver side mirror is mandatory, and you need either the rear-view mirror or the passenger side mirror.

hepcat · Post by **hepcat** » Mon Jul 23, 2018 4:42 pm

So if I understand you correctly, I've been driving around my entire adult life with a side view mirror I didn't legally need?!? Think of how much fuel I would've saved if I'd ditched that wind drag. Think of how much faster I could've gone!

I'm choking on my own rage here.

Isgrimnur · Post by **Isgrimnur** » Mon Jul 23, 2018 4:43 pm

Better than what you're usually choking on.

hepcat · Post by **hepcat** » Mon Jul 23, 2018 4:46 pm

Can someone get Daehawk out of Issie's account again?

Isgrimnur · Post by **Isgrimnur** » Mon Jul 23, 2018 5:20 pm

Will this make up for it?

A collection of Golden Girls action figures were revealed at Comic-Con last night (July 19).

The 8 inch dolls of Dorothy, Blanche, Rose, and Sophia which are dressed in real fabric clothing were unveiled at the San Diego event.

They are currently retailing at $114.99 for the collection.

pr0ner · Post by **pr0ner** » Mon Jul 23, 2018 5:22 pm

Hepcat right now:

hepcat · Post by **hepcat** » Mon Jul 23, 2018 5:53 pm

Before I get too excited, how many points of articulation are we talking about? Under 13 isn't going to be enough for me.

Max Peck · Post by **Max Peck** » Mon Jul 23, 2018 7:04 pm

Susan
Jamie
Jo
Leela
Tegan
Peri
Ace

hitbyambulance · Post by **hitbyambulance** » Mon Jul 23, 2018 7:59 pm

Max Peck wrote: ↑Mon Jul 23, 2018 7:04 pm
Susan

Jamie

Jo

Leela

Tegan

Peri

Ace

you're missing a few

Daehawk · Post by **Daehawk** » Mon Jul 23, 2018 8:32 pm

hepcat wrote: ↑Mon Jul 23, 2018 4:46 pm Can someone get Daehawk out of Issie's account again?

But its warm and moist here. Wait why is it moist? Oh no......

Max Peck · Post by **Max Peck** » Mon Jul 23, 2018 9:02 pm

hitbyambulance wrote: ↑Mon Jul 23, 2018 7:59 pm
Max Peck wrote: ↑Mon Jul 23, 2018 7:04 pm
Susan

Jamie

Jo

Leela

Tegan

Peri

Ace

you're missing a few

That depends entirely on what the list enumerates.

pr0ner · Post by **pr0ner** » Mon Jul 23, 2018 9:12 pm

Max Peck wrote: ↑Mon Jul 23, 2018 9:02 pm
hitbyambulance wrote: ↑Mon Jul 23, 2018 7:59 pm
Max Peck wrote: ↑Mon Jul 23, 2018 7:04 pm
Susan

Jamie

Jo

Leela

Tegan

Peri

Ace

you're missing a few
That depends entirely on what the list enumerates.

What are stripper names?

Kraken · Post by **Kraken** » Mon Jul 23, 2018 9:37 pm

hitbyambulance wrote: ↑Mon Jul 23, 2018 7:59 pm
Max Peck wrote: ↑Mon Jul 23, 2018 7:04 pm
Susan

Jamie

Jo

Leela

Tegan

Peri

Ace

you're missing a few

Sarah Jane!

hepcat · Post by **hepcat** » Mon Jul 23, 2018 10:22 pm

Who ever heard of a stripper named Sarah Jane?

$iljanus · Post by **$iljanus** » Mon Jul 23, 2018 11:31 pm

Kraken wrote:
hitbyambulance wrote: ↑Mon Jul 23, 2018 7:59 pm
Max Peck wrote: ↑Mon Jul 23, 2018 7:04 pm
Susan

Jamie

Jo

Leela

Tegan

Peri

Ace

you're missing a few
Sarah Jane!

Romana

Max Peck · Post by **Max Peck** » Tue Jul 24, 2018 12:41 am

Kraken wrote: ↑Mon Jul 23, 2018 9:37 pm Sarah Jane!

I prefer Leela. Sarah Jane never got to say anything like "Don't worry, Doctor, I'll protect you."

hitbyambulance · Post by **hitbyambulance** » Tue Jul 24, 2018 12:55 am

Leela was maybe the only companion to kill first and ask no questions ever

Smoove_B · Post by **Smoove_B** » Tue Jul 24, 2018 1:06 pm

I figured my parents doing their estate planning (they're in their early 70s) was a good thing, but it's turned them against each other. I think my mom has lost her marbles completely and I fear for whatever it is my dad is trying to do. Yes, a lawyer is setting it all up, but there's just no easy way to tell your mom she's fucking nuts and doesn't understand the bigger picture, is there?

hepcat · Post by **hepcat** » Tue Jul 24, 2018 1:16 pm

Are they divorced or something? Otherwise, what the heck is causing such acrimony?

p.s. you don't have to answer any of that, of course. And if you don't, I'll just continue with my imaginary scenario in which they're fighting over the fate of Baby Smoove (the name they still use for you in my version of the story) should anything happen to one of them.

Smoove_B · Post by **Smoove_B** » Tue Jul 24, 2018 1:21 pm

No, not at all. Married almost 50 years. My dad retired as of March so they're finalizing all of their monies and securing accounts. My dad is trying to set up a trust to protect their retirement money but my mom thinks that if the money is in a trust, she will be frozen out of it if something happens to him and she'll be homeless. Instead, she wants to maintain personal control of all the money, not believing/accepting/understanding that her assets will be taken if she needs hospitalization or some type of care. Having seen friends and family lose their entire estates to hospitals and nursing homes already, you'd think she would understand what my dad is trying to do with the help of an elder law attorney, but it's not going well. And of course, I'm stuck in the middle; I'm an only child so everything falls to me.

This has been a building argument for the last ~3 months as my dad went from working F/T to suddenly being home. Their story is not unusual in that respect, but it's not going well. Complicating it is that I think my mom is f-ing nuts, but there's no way I'm taking sides here.

hepcat · Post by **hepcat** » Tue Jul 24, 2018 1:26 pm

Have your mother read this article. It's enraging.

p.s. in my version of this story, Baby Smoove has a mohawk and drives a trike with a custom license plate that reads "Born to be babied".

Zarathud · Post by **Zarathud** » Tue Jul 24, 2018 1:34 pm

Smoove, PM me.

hepcat · Post by **hepcat** » Tue Jul 24, 2018 1:38 pm

Oh shit, Zarathud (aka "the Lawyer-nator") just stepped into the ring. Things are gettin' real up in here.

(but seriously, he gave Redwarlord some good advice after his mother passed, so he knows his stuff)

Smoove_B · Post by **Smoove_B** » Tue Jul 24, 2018 1:46 pm

Yeah, PM sent. I'm off to the store to get a tarp and some duct tape. Totally unrelated.

hepcat · Post by **hepcat** » Tue Jul 24, 2018 1:57 pm

In other news, I am now guilty of "spite eating". There was no way I was going to let the company accountant have the last piece of the birthday cake they got me last week. Especially since she vetoed every flavor I requested and just got what she liked.

I wasn't even hungry, for Christ's sake. But I was a real trooper and I finished it off. Then I took the fork over to her office and informed her that they should just put it in a museum to honor the work it has done today.

...at which point she informed me she has to leave early today because her father had a stroke last night.

Timing...not my forte.

Trent Steel · Post by **Trent Steel** » Tue Jul 24, 2018 2:03 pm

Smoove_B wrote: ↑Tue Jul 24, 2018 1:46 pm Yeah, PM sent. I'm off to the store to get a tarp and some duct tape. Totally unrelated.

When are you going to write the pilot for your own show "The Smooves" along the same lines as "The Goldbergs"? It would be a frikkin goldmine!

Smoove_B · Post by **Smoove_B** » Tue Jul 24, 2018 2:26 pm

I didn't even tell anyone about the "My TV is broken" phone call this morning. Talking to either one the phone and having the other one yelling over the 1-sided conversation in the background makes me feel like I'm George Costanza every time.

EDIT: Exactly this:

Kraken · Post by **Kraken** » Tue Jul 24, 2018 4:06 pm

Wife gets free will preparation as a job bennie, so a couple of years ago I pushed her to set up an appointment. Wife is one of those people who refuses to talk about death, so this was a big achievement. Lawyer suggested a trust instead of a simple will and listed a bunch of advantages that sounded good at the time. While we were at it, we gave healthcare power of attorney to our best friends (who are just a couple of years younger than us, but both medical professionals). We got all the necessary info together and she drew up papers. We sat around a table with a bunch of lawyers and passed papers like buying a house -- everything signed, sealed, and notarized.

Then, instead of getting copies of all this stuff, Wife got a phone call informing her that her employer only pays for a simple will. We would have to pay one MILLION dollars for the trust stuff. They didn't tell us that up front, of course, so I said Nope, this is a bait-and-switch. And there it stays. Somebody has all the completed paperwork for our legal trust, but it's in some kind of legal limbo. Of course Wife will not deal with it, and as the non-employee I"m on weak ground, and I don't know what to do or say anyway...except that I'm not giving them any money. Being lawyers, they can undoubtedly override my offended sense of justice. (IDK how much they want because they never sent a bill, but I assume it's in the $hundreds at least.)

I figure I should be safely dead before it matters. Sorry, heirs, I tried!