False, in my case at least. I actually am trying to analyze what happened in a time when information is chaotic and restricted.Grifman wrote:It’s victim blaming, plain and simple. I thought most people were against that, maybe I was wrong. I’m pretty sure you’d jump on anyone who said, “Well, maybe that man raped that woman because of the way she was dressed. Maybe that helped motivate him. We need to understand that”.GreenGoo wrote: Wed Mar 29, 2023 10:10 am attempting to understand a person's motives is the first step in dealing with this behaviour.
Speculation is simply part of that. While it's true that speculation can turn to gossip and then "fact", that's not a reason to avoid speculating.
"I heard she killed herself because Brad was going to dump her" is not the same as "Do you think she and Brad were having relationship problems? What other aspects of her life could have influenced her actions?"
Trying to shut down discussion of motives because you don't like what is being speculated is not reasonable or likely.
You're not alone in this Grif. Other members of the board try to shutdown discussion when the topic makes them unhappy too. It's not a rare event, really. But it never works that I can recall.
In addition, this comment is completely ignores the comments l was responding to:
Gossip is actually what is happened in the quotes I cited. No one was really seeking to “analyze” what may have happened. Just look at what was said, “One has a suspicion . . . Possibly significant abuse” and “Abuse at a private and/or religious school - say it isn’t so!” Does that sound more like gossip or an attempt at “analysis”?Speculation is simply part of that. While it's true that speculation can turn to gossip and then "fact", that's not a reason to avoid speculating.
"I heard she killed herself because Brad was going to dump her" is not the same as "Do you think she and Brad were having relationship problems? What other aspects of her life could have influenced her actions?"
I don’t have a problem with actual analysis or seeking to really understand motivations, but this wasn’t even close to that.This victim blaming, regardless as to how you wish to frame it.
FWIW, we do have secondhand information that at least part of my hypothesis was mistaken, tho without the primary source (the manifesto)
https://thehill.com/homenews/state-watc ... nt-school/
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