Random randomness

silverjon · Post by **silverjon** » Thu Jun 16, 2016 11:00 am

It is festival season, and the Freewill Shakespeare Festival is starting soon. I heard a radio ad saying one of the plays this year will be the "epic" love story Romeo and Juliet.

I am thinking "epic love" is the kind where you actually get to stay together for your entire lives.

Oh wait.... Shit.

(I really wanted to say "grow old together", but not everyone gets that either.

)

GreenGoo · Post by **GreenGoo** » Thu Jun 16, 2016 1:43 pm

I'm not sure how much interest there would be in "Romeo and Juliet: a tale of two teen suicides"

dbt1949 · Post by **dbt1949** » Thu Jun 16, 2016 1:44 pm

Growing old together is not all it's cracked up to be either.

LordMortis · Post by **LordMortis** » Fri Jun 17, 2016 2:20 pm

I really need to go home an play video games and then go to bed doing nothing else productuve and blame it on being on restriction now.

Unagi · Post by **Unagi** » Fri Jun 17, 2016 5:50 pm

Illinois' Safe Driver - Online Driver's License Renewal , F T W

TheMix · Post by **TheMix** » Fri Jun 17, 2016 5:56 pm

I now know what it feels like to move a ton of rock. Literally. Apparently that feeling is primarily "owwwww".

Biyobi · Post by **Biyobi** » Fri Jun 17, 2016 9:00 pm

Unagi wrote:Illinois' Safe Driver - Online Driver's License Renewal , F T W

I thought California only allowed up to three online renewals before having to take the test again, but their listed criteria doesn't include that limit. The last time I had to go in was in 2002, and my license still shows me with a lovely thatch of hair. /sigh

LawBeefaroni · Post by **LawBeefaroni** » Fri Jun 17, 2016 9:01 pm

Unagi wrote:Illinois' Safe Driver - Online Driver's License Renewal , F T W

Did it a few days ago, happy to do so. But the $1 service charge for credit card or echeck (the only two forms of accpepted payment) is dumb. Just charge $1 more. There is no other way to pay.

silverjon · Post by **silverjon** » Sat Jun 18, 2016 1:32 am

Well, that was totally a close encounter of the porcupine kind.

TheMix · Post by **TheMix** » Sat Jun 18, 2016 1:38 am

silverjon wrote:Well, that was totally a close encounter of the porcupine kind.

Hopefully a non-painful one.

silverjon · Post by **silverjon** » Sat Jun 18, 2016 3:04 am

It was eating plants in the yard, and I do not live in the country.

We haven't had a dog for a while, and the cat that goes outside came in with no trouble... and then very much wanted to go out again to investigate after he got over being startled by this new animal, but he got told there wasn't enough nope to cover the situation. I wouldn't put it past him to think he might get a trophy rodent of unusual size.

We did go take a really close look at it while it was feeding and it didn't seem to mind. Not really anything to be scared of as long as you're intelligent enough to not try to bite it or fight it.

LawBeefaroni · Post by **LawBeefaroni** » Sat Jun 18, 2016 9:40 am

"Today, my goal is to get intentionally quilled by a porcupine..."

Max Peck · Post by **Max Peck** » Sat Jun 18, 2016 11:27 pm

I always thought the expression "don't get between a mother and her child" was just an expression. Apparently, sometimes it's the literal truth.

A woman in Colorado has saved her five-year-old son by prying open a mountain lion's mouth after the animal attacked the boy in their front yard, officials say. The mother heard screams and raced outside the house near Aspen, where she found the animal on top of her son, the Pitkin County Sheriff's Office said. The boy suffered face, head and neck injuries and was said to be in fair condition at a hospital in Denver.

The unidentified woman said she grabbed one of the animal's paws and stuck her right hand in its mouth to pry it open and free her son's head, Pitkin County Sheriff's Deputy Michael Buglione said. The mother had bite marks on her hand and scratches on her leg after the lion, believed to be two years old, ran off, he added.

That's one tough... mother.

Daehawk · Post by **Daehawk** » Sun Jun 19, 2016 4:28 am

LawBeefaroni wrote:"Today, my goal is to get intentionally quilled by a porcupine..."

Ive watched more of him. That man is insane..not kidding. But I cant stop watching.

Skinypupy · Post by **Skinypupy** » Sun Jun 19, 2016 7:52 am

We brought home a 9-week-old puppy yesterday. Predictably, Wonder Twin 3.0A and Mrs Skinypupy both got hit with a massive stomach virus that had them projectile vomiting all day yesterday and most of last night. I'm now working on about 2 hours of sleep, and the puppy just shit on the rug because I dozed off while playing with her.

Today's gonna be fun.

Unagi · Post by **Unagi** » Sun Jun 19, 2016 9:00 am

Man, when we had little kids (not 6 and 9) - I was NOT about to also take on a puppy. There is just a limit to the number of buttholes (literal) I want to be in charge of.

Default · Post by **Default** » Sun Jun 19, 2016 9:46 am

Unagi wrote:Man, when we had little kids (not 6 and 9) - I was NOT about to also take on a puppy. There is just a limit to the number of buttholes (literal) I want to be in charge of.

That's why I never went into management! <rimshot>

Skinypupy · Post by **Skinypupy** » Sun Jun 19, 2016 9:55 am

Unagi wrote:Man, when we had little kids (not 6 and 9) - I was NOT about to also take on a puppy. There is just a limit to the number of buttholes (literal) I want to be in charge of.

Ever since Vader (our black lab) passed 2 years ago, Mrs Skinypupy has really wanted a new dog. She's been going to the pound once every couple weeks, and sending me pictures of the puppies there. I finally just caved after the 127th request, while telling her that she's gonna have a rough go if Ziggy (the new pup) doesn't take to training right away. 3 year old twins + my crazy travel schedule + potty training both the kids and the dog...she's gonna have a stressful summer.

Isgrimnur · Post by **Isgrimnur** » Sun Jun 19, 2016 2:39 pm

So I met up with the wife after work yesterday for dinner. It's about 8:30, and we've both been gone since before noon. My wife gets the following text from her mother:

Nugget was bad today. I went to store. Before i left i changed my purple wallet with my new one. Put purple back in my big flower purse. Put in same side as my diabetic kit. Zipped mid section up. Set purse upright and left. And home and she(the defendant) had turned purse over got wallet out chewed it a bit. Then got diabetic kit out unzipped it D pulled everything out. Ruined my sticker chewed the reader a bit opened and dumped out the lancets and the container with about 40 test strips. Some were chewed up pretty good. Don't know if she swallowed any of it. The lancets have metal sticker in them. The test strips would prob be hard for her to swallow but im not sure. You can see it when you come home. Hope shes ok. Im mad at her. For a couple of hrs i couldn't find the zippered case. While i was eating a sandwich she brought it to me. Stupid little Bitch!!!!
...
But before u say i should have had it put up remember i dont have a dining room table to put my stuff on

When told that we were taking the dog to the ER vet for X-rays, she told us that we were overreacting. Today, she's mad at us because we have the gall to be upset with her.

Dining room table? No. But she has her bedroom door that could be closed (her dog might get too hot), a dresser that she had put the debris on after the incident that has drawers, and a walk-in closet with yet another door.

Nugget is 8 months old. My wife and I no longer leave anything on the coffee table, nor leave our shoes out because the dog has shown a propensity to chew on them. A lesson that, despite having shoes carried off and purses damaged, my MIL has yet to learn from. How dare we be upset with her over the possibility of injury to our dog over her negligence?!

An hour and $225 later, the dog does not appear to have ingested any metal, and has no difference in behavior. But surely we should have just trusted that things would have worked themselves out.

Daehawk · Post by **Daehawk** » Sun Jun 19, 2016 4:33 pm

Sounds like maybe you'd prefer her living elsewhere.

Smoove_B · Post by **Smoove_B** » Sun Jun 19, 2016 5:46 pm

I know an area relatively close to a convent in Ohio that's apparently chock-full of fun times.

Isgrimnur · Post by **Isgrimnur** » Mon Jun 20, 2016 12:51 pm

Smiths Falls, Ontario - you'll be dying to see our sewers.

Waterworks officials in a small town southwest of Ottawa are monitoring a funeral company that has become the first in Ontario to use an alkaline solution to dissolve human remains, and then drain the leftover coffee-coloured effluents into the sewer system.

Aquagreen Dispositions began operating in a rental unit within the former Rideau Regional Centre in Smiths Falls in May 2015 after receiving a licence from the Ontario government. Hilton's Unforgettable Tails, a parallel business handling the remains of pets, had been using the same process for a couple of years prior to Aquagreen Dispositions, but it took longer to get a licence to handle human remains.

The owner, Dale Hilton, who is from a family of funeral home operators in Smiths Falls, said he watched as the "green wave" swept through the funeral industry, bringing biodegradable caskets and urns.

Hilton said he started the alkaline hydrolysis business in the newly named Galipeau Centre as an alternative to the traditional, energy-using flame-based cremation process.

"It brings your body back to its natural state," Hilton said. "It's the same way as being buried in the ground, but instead of taking 15, 20 years to disintegrate, it does it in a quicker process. And it's all environmentally friendly."
...
Before Aquagreen Dispositions opened, Ted Joynt, the superintendent of facilities for Smiths Falls and the municipal employee responsible for water treatment, inspected the business.

"We keep an eye on these things," said Joynt, whose staff samples the water discharged by the users of the Galipeau Centre campus weekly at the point where it enters the town's sewer system.

Joynt said staff measured two spikes in the output readings from the Galipeau Centre over the last year, but those measurements were within the range acceptable for other commercial water users, and — in any case — the abnormalities couldn't be definitively traced back to Aquagreen Dispositions.

Max Peck · Post by **Max Peck** » Mon Jun 20, 2016 12:58 pm

Isn't that more or less how your typical zombie movie starts?

Combustible Lemur · Post by **Combustible Lemur** » Mon Jun 20, 2016 1:05 pm

We were not deserted

Rip · Post by **Rip** » Tue Jun 21, 2016 9:06 am

The jail in the town I was raised in makes the news.

http://www.wcpo.com/news/state/state-in ... ounty-jail

My father was on the Sheriff's department that controls the jail when I was a teenager.

KKBlue · Post by **KKBlue** » Tue Jun 21, 2016 10:44 am

We all are busy, I am busy. Many calendars are full with tickets to ride, my calendar has many entries.
I texted a girlfriend to give her directions to the condo, we are meeting up briefly tonight. She writes back, "Tonight? I thought it was next Wednesday?"

I counted to ten.

This friend has something with me tonight and Friday (key part in an annual event), and then again next Wednesday.
I text agreeded to next Wednesday and suggested she scroll up on the texting and see what we wrote about just a few days ago.
I'm getting concerned about her delivering on Friday night. Really hope she will work out and deliver. I have to trust all will be fine, she is a professional.

After 15 minutes, I get a reply of oops

I miss drinking.

hepcat · Post by **hepcat** » Tue Jun 21, 2016 11:54 am

Smoove_B wrote:I know an area relatively close to a convent in Ohio that's apparently chock-full of fun times.

Your obsession with Ohio is alarming lately. Were you bitten by a radioactive Buckeye or something? I would need to hear you pronounce "Creek" and ask for a carbonated drink before making an official diagnosis though.

morlac · Post by **morlac** » Tue Jun 21, 2016 11:56 am

silverjon wrote:It is festival season, and the Freewill Shakespeare Festival is starting soon. I heard a radio ad saying one of the plays this year will be the "epic" love story Romeo and Juliet.

I am thinking "epic love" is the kind where you actually get to stay together for your entire lives.

Oh wait.... Shit.

(I really wanted to say "grow old together", but not everyone gets that either. )

Thanks for spoiling it. We have spoiler tags for a reason!

dbt1949 · Post by **dbt1949** » Tue Jun 21, 2016 12:46 pm

No we don't. There is no rhyme or reason as to why things go they way they do here.

Default · Post by **Default** » Tue Jun 21, 2016 1:11 pm

KKBlue wrote:
I miss drinking.

Osmosis is your friend.

Paingod · Post by **Paingod** » Tue Jun 21, 2016 1:25 pm

Rip wrote:The jail in the town I was raised in makes the news.

http://www.wcpo.com/news/state/state-in ... ounty-jail

My father was on the Sheriff's department that controls the jail when I was a teenager.

The little Google Map on that page with a "question mark" guy on it was really helpful.

How many inmates actually escape and stay out? I can't imagine it even being worth trying for anything less than life in prison.

Isgrimnur · Post by **Isgrimnur** » Tue Jun 21, 2016 1:35 pm

CNBC

"New York prison break just one of 2,000 per year," trumpeted a Washington Post headline, one of many news outlets to jump on the news and repeat claims that the disappearance of murderers like Richard Matt and David Sweat's escape from the upstate penitentiary was a drop in the prison break bucket.

The thought of 2,000 hardened criminals escaping from prison every year is totally terrifying. And pretty much not true.
...
To make matters even cloudier, some states don't separate out escapes and AWOLs in their reports at all. According to the BJS, the state of Alabama had more than 600 escapes in 2013. That number is entirely meaningless, said Robert Horton, public information officer for the Alabama Department of Corrections.
...
States have different reporting standards, so comparing between states is nearly impossible, said Horton.
...
Nationally, the number of escapes from prison has dropped more than half in the past 15 years, to a rate of 10.5 escapes per 10,000 prisoners in 2013.

KKBlue · Post by **KKBlue** » Tue Jun 21, 2016 2:02 pm

Default wrote:
KKBlue wrote: I miss drinking.
Osmosis is your friend.

Yes, yes coupled with fond memories.
I get by

hepcat · Post by **hepcat** » Tue Jun 21, 2016 2:18 pm

Scheduling a national board and rpg gaming convention the same weekend as the Gay Pride Parade? 0 dollars

Watching an overweight LARPer dressed as a barbarian and brandishing a fake battle ax getting frightened looks from a drag queen in full Carmen Miranda mode before they both burst into laughter? Priceless

Unagi · Post by **Unagi** » Tue Jun 21, 2016 2:42 pm

So, are the Life is Good monitors and appliances made by the same company that sells Life is Good T-shirts and hats?

Unagi · Post by **Unagi** » Tue Jun 21, 2016 2:43 pm

And, why does this forum advertise that I am going to see a ROUND headed emoji, but I really get this oval headed guy:

or this guy

Zarathud · Post by **Zarathud** » Tue Jun 21, 2016 2:46 pm

My favorite was the muscular tattooed dude dressed as Snow White.

Archinerd · Post by **Archinerd** » Tue Jun 21, 2016 2:48 pm

Unagi wrote:And, why does this forum advertise that I am going to see a ROUND headed emoji, but I really get this oval headed guy: or this guy

I hate the oval head guys. I tolerate the round head ones, but I really just prefer the original sideways text version most. :'\

hepcat · Post by **hepcat** » Tue Jun 21, 2016 2:53 pm

Zarathud wrote:My favorite was the muscular tattooed dude dressed as Snow White.

You missed the 70ish guy who appeared to be homeless and most likely suffering from mental health issues riding around on a beat up old bike while singing "God Save the Queen" at the top of his lungs. He was in front of our hotel Friday night when I got back early. He kept falling off his bike, but wouldn't stop singing. It was actually rather sad.

GreenGoo · Post by **GreenGoo** » Tue Jun 21, 2016 2:54 pm

Unagi wrote:And, why does this forum advertise that I am going to see a ROUND headed emoji, but I really get this oval headed guy: or this guy

That annoys me too. I hate the oval headed emojis.