Octopus Overlords

Not exactly a PC topic, but I'm looking for tips nonetheless.

For those who are married, do you have an agreement of sorts with your wife? Or do you steal a few hours when you can? When do you game (even if you're not married)?

I distract my girlfriend with GTA or Spyro on the PS2, which frees up a couple of hours.

My wife is in the middle of VampireTM:Bloodlines. I'm surfing the net. No problem here.

Work for 35 years then you can play.

My wife goes out either Friday night or Saturday night with her friends. I just stay home and game that night.

During the week she usually is busy doing stuff for a few hours a night so I use that time to game, assuming I have everything done that I need to do.

Oh yeah...it takes me 10 minutes to shower and get ready. She takes nearly 2 hours. That gives me 1 hour and 50 minutes of game time right there if we are going somewhere together.

I work nights (6PM-6AM), so when I come home in the morning I try to get at least an hour or two in before JT (3 yrs old) gets up.

I also have to reacclimate my internal clock on my days off. When I'm scheduled to work the next night, I usually try to stay up the night before, and then sleep that day.

If I could, I'd take my rig to work with me to play here when it's quiet but my wife freaks out at that thought. She feels that a co-worker might steal my rig. There's only 5 of us on a shift. Go figure.

Easy - just find a way to get paid for it. I played a game all afternoon today, wrote a couple of quick articles, and will be paid what amounts to about $50 per hour for my efforts (not including the free game).

Of course, that does tend to suck a lot of the fun out of gaming, but you can't have it all I guess. I vastly enjoyed the three decades of gaming prior to "turning pro" seven years ago. It's never been the same since.

[quote="Jeff V"]Easy - just find a way to get paid for it. I played a game all afternoon today, wrote a couple of quick articles, and will be paid what amounts to about $50 per hour for my efforts (not including the free game).[quote]

Hey, screw you, pal.

Yeah, what he said! ^^^

My wife and I typically just make sure to keep things balanced. From 5:30-8:30 is usually "wife time" and 8:30-11:30 is "game time." Of course I stay up late on weekends to play and she doesn't mind, since usually I've spent most of the day with her. All in all she is extremely understanding.

The whole key is compromise. She doesn't make me give up my hobby for her, and I don't let gaming take over our relationship.

I've been thinking of going the schedule route myself. I like to game when I actually sit down with that in mind and have at least a couple of hours to do it in. I checked the date of my last save gave from the last time I played anything and it was September 17th. It's been 2 months since I last played anything. A few weeks ago I set aside a movie time where I actually set up the surround sound (I have to put away my rear speakers when not using them) and sit down and enjoy a movie or two. I think I will do the same with game time.

My biggest problem is what I'm doing right now, I sit down at the PC and end up surfing the net for fun and general research on stuff I'm interested in, not to mention the time IM's eat up during the day on weekdays before work. If I had a gaming laptop I could get in a lot on breaks and lunch at work and would even have time for some RPG's that have a pause feature while working.

I get up at 6am EVERY SINGLE DAY ...

On weekends, this means I get a good 2-3 hours of gaming in each morning. I also play in the evenings that my wife watches a lot of TV.

I used to schedule a night with my wife for an entire evening of uninterrupted gaming but we've stopped doing that for some reason I don't know. That was a lot of fun. Maybe I should try to get that going again?

Jeff V wrote: Of course, that does tend to suck a lot of the fun out of gaming, but you can't have it all I guess. I vastly enjoyed the three decades of gaming prior to "turning pro" seven years ago. It's never been the same since.

Jeff's right: working in the industry does suck most of the joy out of gaming. You become hypercritical, and it's very difficult to relax into a game and just enjoy it for itself. When you work in gaming, gaming is always work on some level.

To answer the question...

The Bride of Ironrod and I have long held to separate entertainments, so we each have our own office and computer. She spends most of her free time writing, or reading, or watching movies, or watching TV. Once in awhile I join her for a movie, but of the 37 titles currently on our Netflix list, only 8 are mine. We routinely spend time apart together, and we both like it that way.

Being unemployed is a huge help, too, although I don't generally recommend going to that extreme.

YellowKing wrote:From 5:30-8:30 is usually "wife time"

We call this "doing Togetherness Sh!t".

setaside wrote:I get up at 6am EVERY SINGLE DAY ...

Slacker!

I'm usually starting my hour commute to work at 6 am. Last week, I never made it home before 8 pm. Since I have to get up at 4:30 am, that didn't even leave time to catch up on PBEM turns.

Lee and Gromit, next time you find yourselves playing a really shitty game, just think for a moment, "what if I couldn't just uninstall this piece of crap and move on to something I enjoy? What if I had to absorb every painful moment of play then write something that hopefully will get more people to buy said game?" If that sounds like a pretty miserable way to spend a Saturday, then welcome to my world. I guarantee you wouldn't be doing it for shits and giggles - you would demand to be paid for it as well.

Jeff V wrote: Lee and Gromit, next time you find yourselves playing a really shitty game, just think for a moment, "what if I couldn't just uninstall this piece of crap and move on to something I enjoy? What if I had to absorb every painful moment of play then write something that hopefully will get more people to buy said game?" If that sounds like a pretty miserable way to spend a Saturday, then welcome to my world. I guarantee you wouldn't be doing it for shits and giggles - you would demand to be paid for it as well.

Ah, so's your old man.

Naw, I understand your point. Believe me, I wouldn't want to do that either.

I'll have to suggest the schedule thing. I did just give her a hobby, though. She loves jigsaw puzzles, and I never realized that. She can have all the jigsaw puzzles she ever wants. Just let me game!

Geez, I've got a wife, 3 kids, a job with an daily commute of 1 to 1.5 hours (each way) and I play hockey. No wonder I spend much more time reading about games than actually gaming. Plus I write software for a living, so sometimes don't feel like sitting at the computer again after I get home.

I guess I have to rearrange my priorities!

Its not easy to juggle a pregnant wife and a troubled child, but somehow I managed to squeeze in 8 hours of TV a day. -- Homer J. Simpson

I wait until the kids are in bed and then play for maybe an hour or two. Just don't have the time like I used to...

Hrdina wrote:Geez, I've got a wife, 3 kids, a job with an daily commute of 1 to 1.5 hours (each way) and I play hockey. No wonder I spend much more time reading about games than actually gaming. Plus I write software for a living, so sometimes don't feel like sitting at the computer again after I get home.

This is me. After the kids get to bed by 9 p.m., I have to exercise until 10 p.m. So gaming is 10:15 p.m. until about 1 a.m. Up at 6:30. For those of you in your teens and twenties....welcome to gaming of your future.

I wonder if, when the new generation of kids who've been raised on games thir whole lives grows up, there'll be some kind of paradigm shift in the way games playing is viewed. Maybe we'lll see mass abdication of parental responsibilty; maybe we'll see gaming become a far more predominant social activity that surpasses film and television; maybe a whole generation will keel over dead from the sleep deprivation required to sustain a job, a family and a gaming habit 24/7.

What I don't see happening, at least for people like me, is people being willing to accpet a massive reduction in their gaming. It's not something people grow out of any more, I think - the culture is changing, fast.

Food for thought...

don't have kids

with one my gaming time actually increased as I became the designated stay-at-home parent.

child #2 slashed away about 75% of that time (and also of the time I had available to contribute to a website I used to be associated with)

child #3 has made me appreciate my Gameboy Advance a whole lot more. I've barely had an hour a week available for PC gaming in the 16 months since he came along.

Oh, maybe that's why she left!

Well, it got easy to find time once I lost my job. Like Ironrod said, though, I can't recommend that as a solution

Aside from unemployment-induced free time, I used to just try to sneak in game time as often as the wife and kids would let me. I'd slink down to my basement office area and fire up the PC. As we got more kids, though, that got harder to do. It seemed like every 5 minutes my presence was desperately needed for something on the main or (god help me) upper floor. Not only did I have to stop playing to deal with it, but I had to lug my fat ass up and down those stupid stairs. Then, when it was time to build my new PC a few years back, I had an epiphany. How could I salvage game time while still being available to the family? In fact, how could I put myself right at the center of family life such that nobody felt the need to harrass me just because they hadn't seen me in a while, but at the same time be playing a game?

The solution? I built my PC for the living room. I got 16' of video cable, an LCD monitor, a wireless keyboard/mouse, a USB hub and a new end table (that we would have needed anyway). I now sit in my La-Z-Boy with my monitor comfortably angled on my end table and my 55" TV dead in front of me. I can literally keep rambunctious kids pinned underfoot while fragging somebody's ass in an FPS. Depending on the type of game, I can sometimes even keep an eye on it while doing other stuff like helping a kid with their shoes or somesuch.

Best move I ever made for a ideal combination of familial bliss and gaming goodness.

Sith

I make her game with me.

Padre wrote: Maybe we'lll see mass abdication of parental responsibilty; maybe we'll see gaming become a far more predominant social activity that surpasses film and television; maybe a whole generation will keel over dead from the sleep deprivation required to sustain a job, a family and a gaming habit 24/7.

I've seen statistics indicating that gamers watch substantially less TV than non-gamers. It wouldn't surprise me if we sleep less, too...if only because gaming engages the brain, while TV numbs it. I'm down to one hour of TV per week, myself.

I'll chime in for being in the boat of "reading about games more than I play them". And that sucks.

Having a newborn in the house has changed everything for me, including gaming. Would not change it for the world though.

I'm lucky to plop down at my computer at 11:30pm, and I'm so tired by that time, like someone above, I just fart around on the net, reading blue's news, checking out vid card reviews I know I won't buy, etc. Then if I am feeling inspired, and can keep my eyes open, I will pop upen Spider Solitaire. That's right, folks SPIDER SOLITAIRE.

That is what my gaming has been reduced to lately. I am of the ilk that likes to sit down for a "session" when I play a game...I can't cram it in to a 10 minute window, when I get the chance, that is just not enjoyable to me. So I would rather wait until I do have some serious time for a game rather than spend 5 minutes with it.

I guess it also depends a lot on the TYPES of games you like...if like me you like RPG's, turn based strat, more in depth games, then I think it's harder to just pop in and pop out. That is a lot easier to do with FPS games I think.

No wife, no kids.

Since the baby was born my gaming time got a big kick in the crotch. You'll be amazed at how entertaining watching your ridiculously cute daughter kick windchimes can be.

But I play the grand total of three hours a week. 1.5 hours each weekend day.

I plan. I know when the kids take a nap, so I get the housework done in advance to have that time free. When the wife is home, I have no qualms about taking an hour or so to relax. I have given up some alternative entertainments - I hardly ever watch TV anymore, other than DVD episodes with my wife.

Jeff V wrote:Of course, that does tend to suck a lot of the fun out of gaming, but you can't have it all I guess.

I learned that one the hard way myself. I couldn't play a game without analyzing it, without looking at it as a technical combination of seperately analyzed and quantified parts. Levels became polygons with textures instead of hills, rivers, and evil creatures. NPCs became AI routines, scripts, and voice actors instead of innocents I needed to save.

I have utterly enjoyed re-learning how to enjoy gaming as a hobby again over the last couple of months.

When I was married it was easy. I gamed (not just video games) while she did homework. After she graduated and I figured I'd cut back on gaming, she had no interest in spending any time together so I continued to game and filed for divorce. As a gamer (in every sense of the word), someone who enjoys games, will be a requirement for any future serious relationship. This enjoyment will be tested before we ever elected to move in together. As the likelyhood of finding said female gamer is low and the competition among geeks to find one of these gaming specimens is high, I figure I stay single and enjoy my life the way I see fit.

It's all about balance, and each woman has a different "tolerance level" (if they are not the gaming type, which my wife isn't and I think that's a good thing).

We spend a lot of time together, both work at home whenever we want so we are around each other a lot. In the evenings she watches brain numbing shows (reality based), so I get a couple hours of gaming in.. Problem is finding a game anymore that interests me. I spend a lot of time surfing and reading online, was really into WoW when that was in beta (and I got in).

Anyhow the key is balance. Some women want more of your time than others might, as long as either side doesn't end up resenting the time spent it's a good thing. Inversely my wife is good at getting me off my butt and out doing things; and I get her to relax when needed. Works well.

I am married (10 years next year). My wife gets mad sometimes because I am on the computer all the time still. She mentioned the other day that she thought i would "grow out of it", but 10 years later I am still on the computer most any time I am not working, playing games. I told her, "Sorry babe, this is the package you signed up for, I ain't changing.". She seems content with that for a while until she has one of "those days" again and gets mad at me for playing on the computer all the time. I just tell her the same thing again. "I am not changing. So either you stop thinking you are going to change me or kill me. Either way, STFU. Can't you see I am busying playing?"

Hehe, well i really don't tell her that, but I do say that I am not going to stop playing computer games.

Married/several children/couple of jobs/avocations/hobbies.....plenty to do.

I find I play far fewer games. I'm much less likely to spend my time on an interesting failure than I used to be.

Case in point. Children of the Nile. Years ago I would have bought it without hesitation. Now.....Yup...someday I'll likely buy it and play it for a bit, but I've got a dominions2 monkey on my back and Pirates is coming out soon....I just won't have the TIME to try a what could be a very good game.

Silent storm? same story.

Women generally really don't get the computer game thing. I lived with a female friend for a while and it got to the point where, when she had other female friends around, she'd subtly belittle me about it ("babies must play" sort of approach). The middle finger in response was so subtle she wasn't even aware it was being lifted.

You know that stuff you should do frequently - like house cleaning? I put it off.

Jow wrote:I lived with a female friend for a while and it got to the point where, when she had other female friends around, she'd subtly belittle me about it ("babies must play" sort of approach).

Sounds like she wanted your mangina.

She did, but that's a long story I'm glad is over.

Single/one job/no GF/own home.

That's how I find the time.

The person who I am about to move in with, however, enjoys watching me play and encourages me to spend time on the PC. Bizarre, but true.

She loved watching The Sims, of course, but doesn't want to play it herself: she wants me to play and to tell her what's happening, comment, make stupid jokes and so on. She gets a kick out of seeing me whup ass on strategy games, loved seeing all the different creatures on EverQuest (except the spiders) and even sat through about forty seconds of Britney's Dance Beat (or whatever it was called).

Note: I didn't buy it. I got a review copy which lasted about forty-five seconds before being wrenched from the CD drive and, uh, 'lost' forever.

In trade, I shall be spending time listening to the music she composes, reading and appreciating her poetry and (of course) doing the cooking. Sounds good to me.

Jow wrote:she'd subtly belittle me about it ("babies must play" sort of approach).

Incidentally, this is because those women don't understand how you could possibly find something other than shopping or spending time with them of interest. The last girl who tried that approach with me found herself belittled for shoe shopping. Loudly. In public.

She stopped trying to change my habits.

Spike wrote:Note: I didn't buy it. I got a review copy which lasted about forty-five seconds before being wrenched from the CD drive and, uh, 'lost' forever.

We're still waiting for that review, Spike.