Octopus Overlords

So, here am I settling in to read a little before bed, sitting on the couch. I detect movement, rapid movement, in the corner of my eye. A spider, the kind common to these parts, darts across the floor. It's an omen, in essence. This activity will begin increasing on through summer, where I will wage an unholy war against them all, and then I won't see them again for some time.

Squashed the little fucker with a shoe'd foot. Oar wasn't necessary. You don't bring a knife to a gunfight, but you also don't whip out the gun immediately either. It isn't as if they don't know that I can call upon it's awesome power.

Always keep them guessing.

Damned armadillos didn't even hibernate this winter.Nor the moles.My back yard outside the fence looks like a WW1 noman's land.

ENTRENCHING TOOLS!

Here in Texas, you get the choice between spiders, or other, less savory guests of the insectile nature.

I'll take spiders every time.

This morning, I awoke and visited the site of the battle. The spider was still dead. In fact, it was still a combination of scattered parts and the leftover pate. Today, I will allow other spiders to come out and claim the remains, so that they may properly dispose of them in their fashion. I am not an unkind man.

The battle begins again.

I found the first ladybug in our house yesterday. Naturally I screamed made a hasty retreat so my wife could come kill it for me. Actually, Luke developed a fasination with them last year but when they'd fly it would freak him out. I really hope I can break him of his ladybug-in-flight fear. It just isn't right that a boy be afraid of a ladybug.

Hope you don't get those Asian Ladybugs down there - those bastages bite.

Spiders are good guys. Now you have no protection against malaria, yellow fever, West Nile Virus, Eastern Equine Encephalitis, St. Louis Encephalitis, Dengue fever, Rift Valley fever....

May Bob have mercy on your soul...

Smoove_B wrote:Spiders are good guys.

I know. They eat bugs, and bugs are evil.

But I think I'd rather contract everything you just mentioned and die. Spiders have a valuable roll in the ecosystem. But when they aren't doing their dayjob, they're in the middle of an age old battle pitting the forces of arachnia against me. Oh how they like to torment. And they were winning.

I forged the sacred oar. And now we are at a stand still.

Our new house has some new bug control system in it. While being built they stuck tubes in all the walls and put two charging sockets on opposite sides of the house. They come and plug in their truck and pump my walls with beautiful chemicals. These chemicals seep through little holes in the tubes and kill the bugs. The good thing is the chemicals are not sprayed outside the walls where pets or children can drink them.

Peacedog wrote:Always keep them guessing.

How do they guess when they are shoe ooze?

We were cultivating the ulgiest tan and red spider you've ever seen last year on my deck. She made the most glorious webs as she got fatter and fatter. They were literally four feet in diameter and crafted perfectly, brand spanking new, every morning and bright and shiny in the floodlight at night.

I was done with her when for the I don't know how manyth time she tried to catch as I walked outside for a smoke right into her snare and freaked so bad I jumped off the deck and (presumably) broke my toe.

She was so waiting to feed a family for thousands with the blood from my veins.

Austin wrote:Our new house has some new bug control system in it. While being built they stuck tubes in all the walls and put two charging sockets on opposite sides of the house. They come and plug in their truck and pump my walls with beautiful chemicals. These chemicals seep through little holes in the tubes and kill the bugs. The good thing is the chemicals are not sprayed outside the walls where pets or children can drink them.

I've been in the biz for like 9 years now...and I've never heard of that. Are your lightswitch and outlet plates all sealed to prevent it from coming through the walls? Do they cut power to your house when they release pesticides? I'm assuming it's gas?

That's just so...bizarre. Hopefully those fill pipes are locked up. Otherwise I could drive down there and fill your house with ether or something.

Smoove_B wrote:That's just so...bizarre. Hopefully those fill pipes are locked up. Otherwise I could drive down there and fill your house with ether or something.

No kidding. Not to mention the idea of pesticides in my walls has me a little creeped out without thinking of other things to go in the walls.

LordMortis wrote:How do they guess when they are shoe ooze?

His buddies, the ones that today come to claim his carcass, will put it all toether. Of course, they communicate via telepathy. Anyway. The last thing the Demon Spider Queen got from her little scout was likely a muffled squishing sound.

She was so waiting to feed a family for thousands with the blood from my veins.

That's how they operate. You think they're a wonderful part of nature. They're not.

One Rule:

Bugs/spiders live outside, die inside.

Austin wrote:Our new house has some new bug control system in it. While being built they stuck tubes in all the walls and put two charging sockets on opposite sides of the house. They come and plug in their truck and pump my walls with beautiful chemicals. These chemicals seep through little holes in the tubes and kill the bugs. The good thing is the chemicals are not sprayed outside the walls where pets or children can drink them.

Do you have any info/links on this? It sounds like an interesting idea.

It's a company called Wilson Pest Control here in the Winston Salem area. (I think they're local) I know for sure they are working with E.J. Hanes builders as they built my home. I couldn't find much on a qucik search but will take some pic's tonight. If the house across the street isn't sheet-rocked yet perhaps I can get some tube pictures also.

Edit: Something like described here.

Edited again to change the link to what it actually is.

Thank you for sharing your most recent trials and tribulations against the forces of arachnia Peacedog. Your tireless efforts against the 6 legged home invaders have not gone unnoticed. I am inspired by your passion and zealous commitment to duty. Stay vigilant, Brother.

Ripstar wrote:One Rule:

Bugs/spiders live outside, die inside.

That's my policy too. You don't see me crawling around in their trap-holes outside, or trying to climb up into their webs.

Austin wrote:It's a company called Wilson Pest Control here in the Winston Salem area. (I think they're local) I know for sure they are working with E.J. Hanes builders as they built my home. I couldn't find much on a qucik search but will take some pic's tonight. If the house across the street isn't sheet-rocked yet perhaps I can get some tube pictures also.

Edit: Something like described here.

Edited again to change the link to what it actually is.

Sounds like a YK plot.

Little Raven wrote:Here in Texas, you get the choice between spiders, or other, less savory guests of the insectile nature.

I'll take spiders every time.

Run into one of these yet?

Smoove_B wrote:

Austin wrote:Our new house has some new bug control system in it. While being built they stuck tubes in all the walls and put two charging sockets on opposite sides of the house. They come and plug in their truck and pump my walls with beautiful chemicals. These chemicals seep through little holes in the tubes and kill the bugs. The good thing is the chemicals are not sprayed outside the walls where pets or children can drink them.

I've been in the biz for like 9 years now...and I've never heard of that. Are your lightswitch and outlet plates all sealed to prevent it from coming through the walls? Do they cut power to your house when they release pesticides? I'm assuming it's gas?

That's just so...bizarre. Hopefully those fill pipes are locked up. Otherwise I could drive down there and fill your house with ether or something.

Hmm, one day you're sitting in a pest free home and the next day...

Speaking of spiders, Enough was nice enough to PM me a picture of a tarantula named Rosy sitting in his hand yesterday. At least that's what I think it said, I tried to read the text as quick as I could before erasing it.

Can we ban him?

SlapBone wrote:Run into one of these yet?

If so, they haven't bitten me.